Ah, icky


So, horror of horrors, this happened.  Let me elaborate.  There I was, innocently pumping gas at my local station, when I came upon this absolutely rape-tastic product for sale by the cash register.  I just stood there frozen, mouth agape, with the cashier staring at me uncomfortably until I snapped out of it, literally jumping as I came to, took my receipt, and stumbled out bewildered trying to decide if what I saw was real.  One Google later and yes, this is an actual thing: pseudoscience performance enhancers with the violent tagline “sex with a grudge”.  This exists.  This isn’t even thinly veiled misogyny; it just…is.  It actually says “to hurt it” and “to kill it” on the packaging and then has these rape-y stick figure images, just in case you were still uncertain what “it” was or what you apparently need to be doing to “it” to be a real man.  You know, that lovely concept of equating masculinity with domination over women we feminists just looooove seeing time and time again.  Jesus, when will it be considered unhealthy to have sex with and anger towards women occur simultaneously?  I don’t even feel the need to defend my argument to people who might think I’m being oversensitive.  There is simply no other way to interpret this than as an encouragement to those who hate women to try and bang it out of themselves…

However, for you sticklers who might otherwise dismiss this as so much feminazi finger-wagging…

I offer up these testimonials from the company’s own website:

Ever since I started taking S.W.A.G I always have the same result. I can make any woman “TAP OUT”!! I’ve got Chics scared of me now and I LOVE IT!

Ah, well done, sir, well done!  Also, what are “Chics“?

And this testimony from a patron whose female friend (because this is a guy who clearly tons of females would want to befriend) got hold of the soon-to-be-released female version of S.W.A.G:

I already knew how good the male version was, but the WHORE she turned into 45 minutes after she took S.W.A.G HER…  All I can say is DAYUUUMMMMNNNNNNN!

Poets, all of you!

Promoting violence toward women is completely unacceptable. Does no one see how completely sick and messed up that is???? And yes, I’m a man.

Aw, how did that get in there?  Shut up dude, you’re killing all of our boners!


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